A LARGE DEAD animal was floating down the river. On it there were several vultures, tearing away at the carcass; they would fight off the other vultures till they had their fill, and only then would they fly away. The others waited on the trees, on the banks, or hovered overhead. The sun had just risen, and there was heavy dew on the grass. The green fields on the other side of the river were misty, and the voices of the peasants carried so dearly across the water. It was a lovely morning, fresh and new. A baby monkey was playing around the mother among the branches. It would race along a branch, leap to the next one and race back again, or jump up and down near the mother. She was bored by these antics, and would come down the tree and go up another. When We began to climb down, the baby would run and cling to her, getting on her back or swinging under her. It had such a small face, with eyes that were full of play and frightened mischief.
一只死了的大型动物，顺着河流漂浮而下。 上面有几只秃鹫，撕扯着尸体； 它们会击退其它的秃鹫，直到它们吃饱为止， 只有在那时，它们才会飞走。 其余的在树上，在岸边等待，或者在头顶上盘旋。 太阳刚刚升起，草地上有沉重的露珠。 河对岸的绿野朦胧， 农民的声音从水面上传来。 这是一个可爱的、清新的早晨。 一只猴仔在树枝之间围绕着母亲玩耍。 它会沿着一条树枝跑，跳到下一条树枝上，接着再跑， 或者在母亲的附近上下跳跃。 她对这些滑稽的动作感到无聊，会从这棵树下来，爬上另一棵树。 当我们开始下坡时， 这只小猴儿会跑过去，紧紧抓住她，到她的身后，或在她身下晃动。 它有那么小的脸，眼睛里充满了顽皮和怕受伤的惊恐。
How frightened we are of the new, of the unknown! We like to remain enclosed in our daily habits, routines, quarrels and anxieties. We like to think in the same old way, take the same road, see the same faces and have the same worries. We dislike to meet strangers, and when we do we are aloof and distraught. And how frightened we are to encounter an unfamiliar animal. We move within the walls of our own thought; and when we do venture out, it is still within the extension of those walls. We have never an ending, but always nourish the continuous. We carry from day to day the burden of yesterday; our life is one long, continuous movements and our minds are dull and insensitive.
我们对那新的、未知的，是多么地惊恐！ 我们喜欢逗留在我们的日常习惯、例行公事、争吵和焦虑的禁闭中。 我们喜欢用同样老的方式思考，走同样的路， 看同样的面孔，抱有同样的担忧。 我们不喜欢见陌生人，当我们碰见时，我们是冷漠的、心烦意乱的。 当碰见一只陌生的动物，我们是多么地惊恐。 我们在自己的思想壁垒之内移动； 当我们冒险出去时，它仍然在这些墙垣的延伸范围内。 我们从不了断，却总是滋养这个延续物。 我们日复一日地背负着昨日的重担。 我们的生命是一个漫长的、延续性的运动，而我们的头脑是沉闷和不敏感的。
He could hardly stop weeping. It was not controlled or retrained weeping, but a sobbing that shook his whole body. He was a youngish man, alert with eyes that had seen visions. He was unable to speak for some time; and when at last he did, his voice shook and he would burst into great sobs, unashamed and free. Presently he said: “I haven’t wept at all since the day of my wife’s death. I don’t know what made me cry like that, but it has been a relief. I have wept before, with her when she was alive, and then weeping was as cleansing as laughter; but since her death everything has changed. I used to paint, but now I can’t touch the brushes or look at the things I have done. For the last six months I also have seemed to be dead. We had no children, but she was expecting one; and now she is gone. Even now I can hardly realize it, for we did everything together. She was so beautiful and so good, and what shall I do now? I am sorry to have burst out like that, and GOD knows what made me do it; but I know it is good to have cried. It will never be the same again, though; something has gone out or my life. The other day I picked up the brushes, and they were strangers to me. Before, I didn’t even know I held a brush in my hand; but now it has weight, it is cumbersome. I have often walked to the river, wanting never to come back; but I always did. I couldn’t see people, as her face was always there. I sleep, drink and eat with her, but I know it can never be the same again. I have reasoned about it all, tried to rationalize the event and understand it; but I know she is not there. I dream of her night after night; but I cannot sleep all the time, though I have tried. I dare not touch her things, and the very smell of them drives me almost crazy. I have tried to forget, but do what I will, it can never be the same again. I used to listen to the birds, but now I want to destroy everything. I can’t go on like this. I haven’t seen any of our friends since then, and without her they mean nothing to me. What am I to do?”
他几乎无法停止哭泣。 这是一种无法控制或压抑的哭泣，一种震撼他全身的抽泣。 他是一个年轻的人，警觉的眼睛已经看到了这些情境。 他停一段时间，没有说话。当他终于开口时， 他的声音颤抖了，他爆发出了巨大的抽泣，放下了面子，放纵地哭泣。 现在，他说：“自从我妻子去世那天起，我就从没哭过。 我不知道是什么让我哭得这么大声，但它是一个缓解。 我以前哭过，在她活着的时候和她一起哭泣，那哭泣就像笑一样纯洁。 但自从她死后，一切都变了。 我画过画，但现在我不能触摸画笔或看我画过的画。 在过去的六个月里，我似乎也死了。 我们没有孩子，但她期待一个孩子。现在她走了。 即使到现在，我也很难意识到这一点，因为我们一起做了所有的事情。 她是如此美丽，如此善良，我现在该怎么办？ 我很抱歉像这样爆发，天知道为什么我会这么做； 但我知道，哭泣是件好事。但是，这一切再也不会有了。 有些东西已经失去，或许是我的生命。 前几天我拿起画笔，它们对我来说已经陌生。 以前，我甚至不知道我手里拿着一把画笔；但现在它有了份量，是沉重的。 我经常走到河边，想不再回望；但我总忘不了。 我看不见人，因为她的脸总在那里。 我和她一起睡觉、喝水和吃饭，但我知道现在不会再有了。 我对这一切进行了推理，试图使事情合理化并理解它； 但我知道她不在那里。我夜复一夜地梦见她。 但是我不能一直睡觉，尽管我已经尝试过了。 我不敢碰她的东西，它们的味道让我几乎发疯。 我试图忘记，但是不论我怎么做，都再也回不到从前了。 我以前听鸟儿歌唱，但现在我想毁掉这所有的一切。 我不能像这样走下去。 从那以后，我再也没有见过我们的任何朋友，没有她，他们对我毫无意义。 我该怎么办？”
We were silent for a long time.
我们沉默了很长一段时间。
Love that turns to sorrow and to hate is not love. Do we know what love is? Is it love that, when thwarted, becomes fury? Is there love when there is gain and loss? “In loving her, all those things ceased to exist. I was completely oblivious of them all, oblivious even of myself. I knew such love, and I still have that love for her; but now I am aware of other things also, of myself, of my sorrow, of the days of my misery.”
那转变成悲伤与恨的，并非爱。 我们知道什么是爱吗？受到挫折时，爱会变成愤怒吗？ 当存在得失的时候，有爱吗？ “在爱她的时候，所有这些东西都不存在。 我完全忘记了它们，甚至忘了我自己。 我知道那样的爱，我依然对她有那种爱。 但现在，我意识到了其余的东西：我自己、我的悲伤、我悲惨的日子。”
How quickly love turns to hate, to jealousy, to sorrow ! How deeply we are lost in the smoke, and how distant is that which was so close! Now we are aware of other things, which have suddenly become so much more important. We are now aware that we are lonely, without a companion, without the smile and the familiar sharp word; we are aware of ourselves now, and not only of the other. The other was everything, and we nothing; now the other is not, and we are that which is. The other is a dream, and the reality is what we are. Was the other ever real, or a dream of our own creation, clothed with the beauty of our own joy which soon fades? The fading is death, and life is what we are. Death cannot always cover life, however much we may desire it; life is stronger than death. The what is is stronger than what is not. How we love death, and not life! The denial of life is so pleasant, so forgetting. When the other is, we are not; when the other is, we are free, uninhibited; the other is the flower, the neighbour, the scent, the remembrance. We all want the other, we are all identified with the other; the other is important, and not ourselves. The other is the dream of ourselves; and upon waking, we are what is. The what is is deathless, but we want to put an end to what is. The desire to end gives birth to the continuous, and what is continuous can never know the deathless.
爱是多么迅速地转变成恨、嫉妒、悲伤！ 我们在烟雾中迷失得有多深，虽近在咫尺，却那么遥远！ 现在我们意识到了另一个，突然间，变得更为重要。 我们现在意识到，我们孤独，没有一个同伴， 没有了那笑容和熟悉而亲切的话； 我们现在意识到了我们自己，而不是另一个。 另一个是一切，而我们一无是处； 如今，另一个去了，而我们却成了那样。 另一个是一个梦想，而现实却是我们这个样子。 另一个是真实吗？ 还是我们自己创造的一个梦想，披着我们赋予的欢乐的华彩 —— 那欢乐却在快速地褪色？ 褪色是死亡，生命就是我们的现状。 死亡不能总是盖住生命，无论我们多么地想它； 生命比死亡更强壮。现状比非现状更强壮。 我们多么喜爱死亡，而无视生命！ 拒绝生命，是如此令人愉快、如此的忘我。 当另一个在时，我们不在； 当另一个在时，我们是自由的、不受拘束的； 另一个是花、是邻居、是香味、是记忆。 我们都想要另一个，我们都认同另一个； 另一个是重要的，而不是我们。 另一个是我们自己的梦想；醒来后，我们就是现在的状态。 现状是不死的，我们却想结束现状。 这种结束的欲望，诞生出这种延续物， 延续下来的东西，永远不可能知道那不死的。
“I know I cannot go on living like this, a half-death. I am not at all sure that I understand what you are saying. I am too dazed to take anything in.”
“我知道我不能这样了，这半死不活的样子。 我完全不确定，我是否理解你在说什么。 我太茫然了，什么都听不进去。”
Do you not often find that, though you are not giving your full attention to what is being said or to what you are reading, there has nevertheless been a listening, perhaps unconsciously, and that something has penetrated in spite of yourself? Though you have not deliberately looked at those trees, yet the image of them suddenly comes up in every detail – have you never found that happening? Of course you are dazed from the recent shock; but in spite of that, as you come out of it, what we are saying now will be remembered and then it may be of some help. But what is important to realize is this: when you come out of the shock, the suffering will be more intense, and your desire will be to escape, to run away from your own misery. There are only too many people who will help you to escape; they will offer every plausible explanation, conclusions which they or others have arrived at, every kind of rationalization; or you yourself will find some form of withdrawal, pleasant or unpleasant, to drown your misery. Till now you have been too close to the event, but as the days go by you will crave for some kind of consolation: religion, cynicism, social activity, or some ideology. But escapes of any kind, whether God or drink, only prevent the understanding of sorrow.
难道你没有时常地发觉， 虽然你没有完全地注意说出的话，或者你读出的内容， 但是，却存在一种倾听，也许是无意识的， 尽管你自己没有意识到，某些东西却已经渗进去了？ 虽然你没有刻意看那些树， 但它们的形象突然间露出了每一个细节 —— 你难道没有发现过这种情况吗？ 当然，你对最近的震惊感到茫然。 尽管如此，当你从中走出， 我们现在所说的话将被记住，那么它可能会有些帮助。 但重要的是要意识到： 当你从这个震惊中走出，这种痛苦会更加强烈， 而你想逃避，逃出你所拥有的痛苦。 有太多太多的人想帮你逃离； 他们会提供他们或别人得出的每一种合理的解释、各种合理的结论； 或者你自己会找到某种退缩的形式 —— 不管它是愉快还是不愉快的形式，以淹没你的悲伤。 直到现在，你与这个事件离得太近了， 但随着时间的流逝，你会渴望某种安慰： 宗教、愤世嫉俗的态度、社交活动，或某些意识形态。 但是，任何形式的逃避，无论是上帝还是美酒，只会阻止对悲伤的理解。
Sorrow has to be understood and not ignored. To ignore it is to give continuity to suffering; to ignore it is to escape from suffering. To understand suffering needs an operational, experimental approach. To experiment is not to seek a definite result. If you seek a definite result, experiment is not possible. If you know what you want, the going after it is not experimentation. If you seek to get over suffering, which is to condemn it, then you do not understand its whole process; when you try to overcome suffering, your only concern is to avoid it. To understand suffering, there must be no positive action of the mind to justify or to overcome it: the mind must be entirely passive, silently watchful, so that it can follow without hesitation the unfolding of sorrow. Mind cannot follow the story of sorrow if it is tethered to any hope, conclusion or remembrance. To follow the swift movement of what is, the mind must be free; freedom is not to be had at the end, it must be there at the very beginning.
悲伤必须被理解，不能被忽视。 忽视它，就是在让痛苦延续； 忽视它，就是从痛苦中逃跑。 要理解痛苦，需要一种可操作的、实验性的着手方式。 做实验，不是为了寻求一个确凿的结果。 如果你寻求一个确凿的结果，实验就做不成了。 如果你知道你想要什么，那么去追求它，这种追求不是实验。 如果你试图克服痛苦，谴责它，那么你就不理解它的整个过程； 当你试图征服痛苦时，你唯一的关切就是避免它。 要理解痛苦，头脑绝不能去辩解或克服它，不能有这种主动性的行动： 这个头脑必须完全地被动，安静地警戒， 那样，它才能毫不犹豫地跟随悲伤，任其展开。 头脑不能追随这个悲伤的故事，如果它被任何一个希望、结论或记忆牵绊。 要跟上现状的飞速运动，这个头脑必须是自由的； 自由不是在最后拥有，它必须在一开始就存在。
“What is the meaning of all this sorrow?”
“这一切的悲伤有什么意思？”
Is not sorrow the indication of conflict, the conflict of pain and pleasure? Is not sorrow the intimation of ignorance? Ignorance is not lack of information about facts; ignorance is unawareness of the total process of oneself. There must be suffering as long as there is no understanding of the ways of the self; and the ways of the self are to be discovered only in the action of relationship. “But my relationship has come to an end.”
悲伤不是冲突的征兆，不是痛苦与快乐的冲撞吗？ 悲伤不是暗示着无知吗？ 无知不是缺乏有关事实的信息； 无知是对自我的整体状态的忽视。 不理解自我的方式，就必定痛苦； 而只有在关系的行为中，自我的方式才能被发现。 “但我的关系已经走到头了。”
There is no end to relationship. There may be the end of a particular relationship; but relationship can never end. To be is to be related, and nothing can live in isolation. Though we try to isolate ourselves through a particular relationship, such isolation will inevitably breed sorrow. Sorrow is the process of isolation.
关系是没有尽头的。 一段特定的关系可能会走到头；但关系永远没有尽头。 存在即是关联，没有什么能孤立地存活。 虽然我们试图通过一种特定的关系来孤立我们自己， 这种孤立，将不可避免地滋生悲伤。 悲伤就是孤立的行为。”
“Can life ever be what it has been?”
“生命总是这样吗？”
Can the joy of yesterday ever be repeated today? The desire for repetition arises only when there is no joy today; when today is empty, we look to the past or to the future. The desire for repetition is desire for continuity, and in continuity there is never the new. There is happiness, not in the past or in the future, but only in the movement of the present.
昨天的欢乐能在今天重复吗？ 只有当今天没有了欢乐，才会升起想要重复的欲望； 当今天是空虚的，我们就回顾过去或展望未来。 重复的欲望，就是想延续的渴望，而在那延续中，永远不会有那新的。 这儿的幸福，不在过去或将来，却只在此刻的运动中。